toilet paper. . .

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If Emma has to go potty and Ellie’s taking a nap, she puts a piece of toilet paper on the lid to let remind her later to flush it.  With the bathroom right across the hall from Ellie’s room and her door not completely shut, the toilet occasionally wakes Ellie up.  Everyone was down for their nap today and I walked by Emma’s door and she peeked her head out and said she needed to go potty.  She ran in the bathroom, closed the door and came out a couple minutes later and went back to her room.  I was putting up laundry and walked past the bathroom and noticed the entire toilet lid covered with toilet paper.  Emma usually puts ONE maybe TWO pieces of toilet paper on the lid, usually if she goes poopy.  I’m too scared to open the lid to find what’s waiting to be flushed.  If you notice, she even put toilet paper on the step stool!  Ohh Lord. . .

turbo jam. . .

I got my new workout DVDs in the mail last Friday. . .damn you infomercials!!  I know that I’m not going to be able to go walking at night and the thought of getting my children out in the cold during the day only to hear, “I’m cold, I need something to drink, my nose hurts, my feet are cold, it’s so cold I cannot even move my legs. . .”  And that’s just from Emma.  Ellie would either be crying or so bundled up that I wouldn’t be able to hear her from under the 12 layers.

I have Pilates for Dummies, but I’m just not looking forward to it.  I’m not graceful and ever since the fly-swatter incident, I really have a lot of bottled up anger I need to get out.  Turbo Jam is a “workout with calorie-blasting kickboxing, body sculpting, and the hottest dance music.”  I enjoy the kickboxing and body sculpting, but I do it in the privacy of my own home because of the dance music.  I started on Monday and have done the 20-minute Learn & Burn every day.  Some of the instructor’s tips on how to do the moves correctly is “pretend that you’re grabbing someone’s head and bringing it down to your knee with alot of force.”  Did I just hear that right???  Anyway, when I’m done, I’m sweating, I feel sore and have a lot less stress.  I feel like an idiot doing the workout, but then again, I was an idiot for putting on all the weight.  I wrote down all my measurements and was far from the 36-24-36 impossible body type (and if you are this, shut it).  My BMI still has me as overweight, but I’m so happy to be considered “prone to health risks” rather than obese like I was before I started this long journey of losing weight almost two years ago.  Turbo Jam’s main selling point is 10 pounds, 10 inches in 10 days.  If I can get my pants really loose before Thanksgiving next week at Grandma’s, that would be great!  I’m going to take my DVD with me and I think I’ve talked Jess into working out with me. . .of course in the privacy of a bedroom with the door locked. . .wait, that didn’t sound right?!? 

history repeats itself. . .

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I was 2-years-old maybe 3 and decided that my head could totally fit in the chair at the kitchen table.  You’re probably wondering why someone would do this, but do you not try to put a ring on your finger that is obviously too small only to say ohh S%*T when you can’t get it off?  Have you ever put your arm or hand in a hole to try and reach something knowing in the back of your mind that your arm won’t fit, but do it anyway?  Even at the wise age of 26, I’m constantly looking at the space between bars and taking it as a personal challenge that my head won’t get stuck.  Call it dare devil, most would call it stupid, but I have passed this trait down to my children.  I guess actually getting my head stuck has caused a psychological theory that if it happened once, surely it won’t happen again.

tat24u. . .

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My husband has been corrupted and is now part of the tattoo community.  It wasn’t that I didn’t think he was brave enough to get a tattoo, but I never thought he could make that transition that it would be somthing permanently on his body.  I became part of the tattoo community 7 years ago (man am I old?!?).  The first one on my ankle, I love and still love today.  The one on my back was one of those moments of bravery but mostly stupidity. 

We went out Saturday night with are neighbors for an adult evening which included dinner at Abuelo’s (and drinking), going bowling (and drinking) and then Starbuck’s (and drinking. . .coffee!).  We had such a good time and are going to try to do this once a month, but more realistically every other month.  It was about 11:30 p.m. and they were heading home and Dustin and I decided to just go look at some tattoos.  The last time we “just went to go look” we came home with a new truck.  We’re not much for window shopping.  The first place we went to was okay, but definitely had that feeling of “I really don’t think they have a dictionary and probably won’t spell the word you want tattooed across your chest correctly.”  Plus, it’s a personal opinion of mine, but I don’t want tattoos by people named after insects or reptiles, sorry Roach, you and your buddy Snake aren’t getting our business.  We were dressed up from our evening out, so we got the once-over before they would tell us a price. . .surprise, surprise.

Needless to say, we left that place and went to one more before calling it a night.  We walked in and the guy said to let him know if we needed anything because he was in the back drawing.  This was a good sign because on Miami Ink and LA Ink, they are always drawing tatttoos and whatever happens on TV is always correct!  Dustin looked through a bunch of tatttoos and actually found what he had been looking for.  He had been searching for some on the Internet for the past couple of months.  So an hour later (1:15 a.m.), Dustin got his birthday present (a couple of weeks early).  I personally like the picture of him quazi-flexing his arm.  These were taken maybe 12 hours after he got it.

Ellie’s 1st Halloween. . .

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Awww, my little chicken did so good.  She was nice and warm in her costume and her ears didn’t get wind blown.  Nothing says what a Halloween like an ear ache.  The girls had the best time.  Only in Panhandle can you leave your truck running and go to all six houses on a block and then hop back into your truck for the next block.  Ellie had so much candy in her bucket, I had to dump some in Emma’s bag.  Ellie growled at me.  My sweet, little baby girl growled at me for taking her candy.  You’re 10-months-old and don’t even know what candy is, why are you growling at me???  She did so good holding her bucket.  She didn’t even let it go when we got back in the truck.  Emma got enough candy and was on such a high the whole evening, it took a whole 3 1/2 minutes for her to fall asleep.  She really was a Sleeping Beauty.

or be shot. . .

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When we were coming back from town, Dustin wanted to show me this house some people were talking about at work.  It’s off the back highway outside of Panhandle.  Ellie’s was asleep in the back and Emma was doing the pee pee stretch (she stretches her legs straight out everytime we’re in the truck and she needs to go potty, it never fails that her legs do this about half a block away from the house), so I knew we had some time.  We turned down the dirt road and looked at the beautiful scenery of nothingness.  We went over some railroad tracks where a train was stopped a couple hundred feet back and drove towards this ginormous (gigantic + enormous) house.  There were three 2-car garages. . .three!  That’s for six vehicles.  Not to mention the ejungous (enormous + humongous) red barn that was built for a plane.

We drove past the house and decided to turn around in this old abandoned farm houses driveway.  Both Dustin and I love old looking houses and this one definitely had a story behind it.  Granted the story looked a little Texas Chain Saw Massacre-ish, but I’m not one to judge.  This was all before we got a better look at the No Trespassing sign posted on the gate.  See if you can read it.  The stop sign at the end of the street leading to the old house has bullet holes through it.  What a nice family drive Dustin has taken us on.

halloween party. . .

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I know, I know, what about Steph?  What has she been doing in that funfilled life she has?  Never fear, I am back with oodles and oodles of fabulous stories of baby poop, unfortunately Emma poop and everything else that has gone on in my life the last couple of days, errr weeks. 

Since the pumpkin patch, we’ve been to a Halloween Party with some of Dustin’s friends from high school.  I met them at the 10-year reunion and we really hit it off.  Cody and Brooke invited us over for a family Halloween Party.  How great was that?!?  No finding a baby sitter, no worrying about leaking breastmilk, again these are usually not most people’s concerns at the party, but again I’m a little different.  The only catch was EVERYONE had to dress up.  The last time I dressed up for Halloween, I think I was a Spice Girl my sophomore year of high school.  I was Sporty Spice.  I had a temporary tattoo. . .hmmm. . .wearing athletic clothes all the time and sporting tattoos. . .did I really see my future back in high school? 

Needless to say, I was in desperation to find a costume because I really didn’t want to go as a whore for Halloween.  Have you seen those adult costumes they have now?  Under different circumstances and 40 less pounds, totally sign me up for a beer wench, but with two kids, birthing hips and stretch marks, I don’t think so.  My choices were flapper, I totally have flapper hair and a hippie.  Short dress, long legs, it was a win-win situation.  Mom saved the day and made my dress for me in 24 hours give or take a couple of hours.  Apparently I’ve become more shy since my junior high through college days of wearing tye-dyed shirts and anything that screamed color because the fabric I chose was definitely screaming.

Dustin went as a rodeo cowboy, that was a real hard one for him to find.  “Umm, let’s wear my everyday jeans, shirt, belt, hat, boots and how about I grab my old rodeo chaps and vest (from high school) from my bag in the shop.”  The only thing that fits me from high school are my socks.  Emma went as Princess Aurora (Sleeping Beauty) and Ellie went as a chicken.  I fought with so many elderly people that believed with all their might that Ellie was a duck.  I know the bill looks duckish-like, but I bought a chicken outfit.  No I didn’t raise chickens as a child, but I bought a chicken outfit.

The husbands and wifes costumes went together, so next year (if we’re invited back, hint hint!), we’re really going to have to put some extra thought into this.  The last pictures are of the girls after the party.  Ellie’s giving the thumbs-up to good hygiene.  She was so tired.