I’m not in denial. . .I understand. . .today, Mom probably likes Jess more than me. I know she loves us equally, but Jess didn’t go out on a date with her husband and end up in a tattoo shop. One marriage, two kids and seven years later, I finally got another tattoo. It’s like Dad always said, I can get away with anything because I’m all about presentation. I made sure we got back to Mom and Dad’s early, we left our smoke filled clothes down stairs in the patio, we took showers so that the bed wouldn’t smell like smoke. . .it might not be presentation, but maybe thoughtfulness?!?
Mom did come down the stairs and I had that 19-year-old flashback of “Ohhh God, I got a tattoo, she’s going to kill me.” Then I realized honesty is the best policy, so I asked Mom if she’d rather be mad at me now or in the morning. You have to realize, the last time Dustin and I went out on a date, he came home with a tattoo. Dustin said that Mom and Dad are never going to watch the girls for us again! I’ve been wanting this tattoo forever, or at least for a year (Ellie had to be born first).
It’s totally Dad’s fault too. Note to self: When in doubt, blame Dad. Dad has always said live each day as if it were your last, and in my own way I have taken that theory to tattoos. . .and Starbucks. I don’t want to complain 20 years from now about what I should have or wanted to do back then. If I want a tattoo, I’m going to get a tattoo. I will fear my Mom, but I will get a tattoo. Plus, she can’t stay mad at me. She did finally look at it this afternoon and then gave Ellie a high-five for pushing the tattoo really hard and hurting me. Does anybody remember the hair dryer she held an inch away from my back to dry the tattoo covering make-up on my wedding day??? Ruthless, I tell you. Okay, so I understand why on my wedding day, my mother had to spend about an hour covering a tattoo that I got on a whim, and wasn’t really too happy about that. But that hair dryer was really hot on my back.
Going back to Starbucks. I made fun of those people that spent most of their paychecks on their daily Starbucks Carmel Cappachino Latte with foam and chocolate sprinkles. Make that a Grande (obviously you can tell I don’t drink coffee nor do I know the names of what they are or their spellings). But it’s something about those people and how happy they look. It’s probably the caffeine, but those people are so stinkin’ happy. And then I joined the Starbucks cult with my no water Chia Tea Latte with whip cream thanks to my mother-in-law. It’s like a liquid pumpkin pie with cool whip and I make this goofy face once a week when I get one. Those people may be spending hundreds of dollars a month on coffee their going to pee out when they get to the office, but for those 15 minutes, they are at peace with the world, and I now know their peace.
So as I finish typing this, Mom now loves Jess and I equally and possibly likes us the same. Dad has probably made a joke about how it could be worse and I could have gotten the tattoo of a snake starting at my ankle, wrapping around my body and finishing taking a bite out of my boob. See, when in doubt, always think it could always be worse. . .and blame Dad.